merry christmas!

... and we're having a GIRL!

that was nice and dramatic, wasn't it. i really wasn't saving my girlie girl announcement til christmas, i just kept forgetting to post it. and that's b/c i wanted to post a picture of her as well, but my relationship with my new printer/scanner has gotten off to a rocky start. very rocky. so you may not get to see her in my womb. but trust me, her skeletal system is flat out adorable. 

get ready to pink it out!

so it's early christmas morning. i'm the only up and not on purpose. i was awakened by my own coughing fit. has that ever happened to anyone? your sound asleep and then you start violently coughing your head off? what causes that? a shift in inter fluids or something? david valentine once told me that statically people swallow 7 spiders in their sleep a year or something. so i always think, oh gah! i'm choking on a spider!

but i'm sure it wasn't a spider this time b/c i have bronchitis. i'm on the mend, but it hasn't been fun. it's my 3rd pregnancy, after all, so every time i cough a little pee comes out. 

ok, christmas day! i hope it's wonderful for you. drink something warm and yummy. eat some tasty treats. remember: you can't expect rational behavior from irrational people, so receive your relatives with love and forgiveness. and, have a christmas cocktail for me, pregnant lady.

speaking of christmas morning, here's an oldie, but goodie...

merry christmas! God bless you!

adventuous spirit

i haven't known much about what advent exactly is. like a lot of things, i was over-thinking it. 

advent is latin for "coming" or "arrival." it's a season of preparation. specifically it's a celebratory anticipation for those that believe Christ is the Son of God to celebrate his birth. in other words, "i can't wait to celebrate Jesus' birthday. i'm actually so excited to celebrate that day that i want and need to have small reflective celebrations to count down to the celebration." this attitude is also, i've decided, known as having an adventuous spirit. (yes, i made up a new word.)

i'd like to have an adventuous spirit. i can say - yes, i feel that way. but it's easy to become bogged down in thick "christmas season" traditions and "to do" lists. the countdown to Jesus' birth excites me, but the countdown to christmas can sometimes stress me out. 

i love how my kids don't struggle with this. it's all anticipation, all excitement all the time. at this point they understand a lot more about "getting presents" than they do "God in a virgin womb," but still. i think what i might be saying is, as children, most of us have the foundation for an adventuous spirit. but as we get older, other crap can screw with that foundation. i don't know. 

anyway, i didn't have a whole lot of exposure to advent as a kid. i've wanted to do something with my own family, but never really got a plan together. do i get calendar with little doors that open?  a little house with candy compartments? do we participate in a full out activity everyday after dinner from nov. 30 - dec. 25? again... over-thinking. i shopped around and what's available is overwhelming (and a little disturbing). i mean, Lightening McQueen has his own advent calendar. even Legos makes an advent calendar.  i came across this book and it's been perfect for us - it's called the Bible. you should read it. no, i'm kidding. not about reading the Bible, but about what i found. 

it's called The Story of Christmas Story Book Set and Advent Calendar. it opens from the middle and on the inside contains 24 miniature books, each telling 3-ish paragraphs of the story. the little books are attached to a gold tie so once you've removed them, they can be hung on the tree. the book also includes the prophecies of Christ's birth from Isaiah and Micah as well as a map of the holy land. it's easily found it's way into our bedtime story routine and now whenever i hear "mommy, when is christmas gonna be here?!," i can say, go look at the advent book. 

coming together at the end of the day and reading a "chapter" from "the story of christmas" has felt like a foundational re-set every evening. especially with little boys hearing much of the story for the first time. whatever the day was like, we're able to end it on a note of truth - truth we want to celebrate. 

of course, lent is also a time of preparation. i came across this straight-forward explanation of the difference between advent and lent. i liked it so i'll share it:

There's a time to get ready by focusing on your own sinfulness and wrongdoing, a time for personal transformation and following Christ to the cross. That's Lent. There's a time to get ready by rejoicing that our God is not far away and unfamiliar with the struggles of human life, that Christ is here right now among his followers, that God has already begun to bring in the Kingdom, and that Christ will come again to make it clear who really runs the place. That's advent.

interestingly, celebrating advent has made me more excited to celebrate advent. hmm, something is happening...

let's get the advent party started! unless the rapture happens before then (i'm just sayin'), we'll advent it out next year fo' sho'. i'm open for ideas. so tell me, how do you and your family participate in the season of advent? 

helpless

today i feel helpless. this happened last night. i'm pointing you to the official crossroads statement, but it's all over the news. y'all know this is where dr is a pastor and i used to work there as well. the last 17 hours have been devastating and surreal to say the least. 

i know God is a God of miracles, wonders and restoration. i've been reading this book, MegaShift by James Rutz, and it discusses how God's power and people are on the move. It documents tons of present day miracles that have happened all over the world including dozens of resurrections. i asked for this, begged for this, demanded for healing, restoration, resurrection... and yet, it did not happen. 

i still believe God is bigger and my faith stands. but re: this event, i just don't understand.

i'm posting this for 2 reasons: 

1. i'm asking that you pray however you feel lead for this situation and the people involved. 

2. even though my emotions and thoughts are all over the place, i'm declaring that God is still the God of Israel and is awesome. He is still in the business of miracles.

here, watch this if you haven't seen if before. or even if you have. i'm only including the first of four parts. go to youtube to see the other 3 parts. look for "Raised from the Dead" Part 2, etc.  i love how the wife says, "i reminded God of his promises." it's absolutely ok to do that. 

weepy

i'm weepy. extra weepy, i should say. i'm definitely someone who tends to tear up. i have learned that's entirely ok, but it's a pain if you have on make-up. when i worked at crossroads, i would tell new female hires "bring your make-up to work" b/c a God conversation or "heart conversation" could break out any minute and you find yourself sobbing before lunch. anyway, i first discovered i was extra weepy when i was driving down the road, minding my own business and "fancy" came on the radio. next thing i know, i'm totally crying. "here's your one chance, fancy. don't let me down." her momma's just trying to move her up town. dear god, what a story. this sort of weepiness is down right embarrassing. i'm in my car, i'm alone and yet i've got that feeling like i hope i'm not on a reality show right now. 

commercials like this don't help at all:

come on! weep me out! i promise you there are women out there that watch this commercial and for a split second wish they could not hear. 

ok so anyway, i'm weepy. it's easy to write it off as pregnant hormones and maybe physically that's some of what's going on. but i know that my physical, my spiritual -- all that is connected. so if my spirit is extra sensitive right now, i want to be open to that. being pregnant is definitely a constant state of vulnerability. people are constantly analyzing your body, your feelings ("how are you feeling?"), your general state of affairs ("are you ready for the baby?"). i don't mean in a critical way, i just mean that's the general topic of conversation. so if one isn't used to be analyzed all the time, it can feel vulnerable to say the least. i don't mind any of this. i'm just wondering about my weepiness. I Timothy 2:15 says "But women will be saved through childbearing - if they continue in faith, love and holiness with propriety." i mention that to point out that stuff can definitely happen in our spirit when we bear a child. so maybe something is happening in mine. 

here's some weepy i don't mind: pregnant-at-christmas weepy. man, if you believe in the whole Jesus thing and your listening to someone read about little pregnant mary while you're feeling a little fist punching your blatter... well, all i can say is if that doesn't make you cry, you must lack tear ducts and a soul. 

it is such a blessing to be nauseous, exhausted, fat and swollen as you reflect on the birth of Christ. i believe every word of the Bible, literally. but there's so much i just can't imagine. for example, i cannot imagine living in a boat for 40 days with 2 of every animal and my extended family. maybe one or the other, but not both. i cannot imagine being inside the belly of a fish. but i can, a little bit, put myself in mary's sandals and imagine my big pregnant arse on a camel hoping i don't go into labor until we reach our destination. ok, see... i'm doing it right now. weepy, weepy. 

there's only one thing to do now...

(come on, you knew this was coming.)

mary's tortellini soup

before i begin to talk about how delicious this soup is, i have a small caveat about the photo. i don't know if i'm really bad at food photography, or if this soup just isn't photogenic, or both. but this is a lack luster photo of a scrumptious soup. and yet, i feel so strongly about the value of recipe photos that i continue to leave this photo in the post. this is where your trust comes in. and now, the soup post...

i could eat soup everyday, especially this time of year. i love the idea of making a big pot of something hearty that can sit on the stove all day and should a weary traveler wonder through your door, you've got something to warm his bones. this soup is no exception. and it's hard to get your hands on any recipe of mary's, simply b/c she's like my grandma mac - an awesome cook that keeps her recipes in her head or written down on some yellowed Ben Franklin receipt under a stack of 1986 phone books. mary is a fine chef, so pay no mind to the scary photo. this soup is easy and delicious.

Mary's Tortellini Soup

1 pound italian sausage

1 can tomato sauce (16 oz.)

1 cup dry red wine

3 cans beef broth

2 teaspoons italian seasoning

2 cans diced tomatoes 

1 onion

1 garlic clove, crushed

2 small zucchini

some carrots, sliced

1 tablespoon sugar

1 package cheese tortellini

Saute sausage in skillet. Add onion and garlic.

In a soup pot, mix all canned ingredients, all seasoning, red wine and broth. Add sausage mixture. Add all other ingredients, except tortellini. Simmer for 30 minutes. Add "raw" tortellini and let it cook in the soup mixture. 

It's good with salad and ciabatta bread.

Note: I like to stretch out my soup so I doubled broth and wine. If you do this, you should also add a little more sugar and seasoning. 

Also, you might be interested in knowing that 3 cans of broth = 1 32 oz. box of broth. 

enjoy!

good morning, joy!

yesterday morning, the boys woke up full of joy. i mean, they were covered in it. at first, i couldn't figure out what was going on. it all started when i woke mac for kids' club. he usually protests going for a few minutes before he surrenders to the plan. but yesterday morning, he popped right up. he was excited and speaking politely to both me and his dad. 

next, i head into bode's room. typically, if things aren't going exactly as he would like, then he's mr. pissy about everything. he's mad about getting dressed, he's mad if mac comes in his room. he's just mad and cranky. well, yesterday, i slip in and say good morning. he says, good morning and expresses concern that his "babies" (rhino and cleveland browns dog) are not in his bed. mac enters, "good morning, bode." bode replies, "good morning, mac. have you seen my babies?" mac answers, "no, but would you like me to help you look for them?" bode says yes and mac clarifies, "ok, i will. but i have to get dressed first." (this was an act of staying focused on what i had asked him to do, rather than being distracted.)

so, i'm kind of in awe at this point. 

now i'm expecting a fight with bode re: clothes, but he says, "mommy, i need to get dressed." i give him clothes and exit. he runs to the bathroom naked and meets mac in the hallway on the way back. "bode, you want me to help you look for your babies now?" bode has changed his mind. "no mac. will you come in my room? i have to get dressed." mac replies, "oh yes." 

bode and mac proceed to bode's room, which is the size of a large walk-in closet. as bode shuts the door, i hear him welcoming mac, "this is my room and there's all kinds of wonderful things." mac says, "oh thank you. can i play with this?" "yes, mac, you can."

i'm in the hallway, "what the hell...?"

this goes on throughout the day. they talked about sharing over breakfast and laughed together. after service, i went to pick mac up first and he had made a sword out of poster board as a part of the lesson. i'm thinkin' oh great. he's going to swing it around bode, bode will have some lame picture and start whining for a sword. well, we proceed to the 3 year olds to pick up bode and mac is holding up his sword ready to chop bode when he comes out. but, behold! bode comes out with the poster board shield he made. the boys are both delighted with the other's weapon as it is a challenging, yet fair fight. i'm like - are you kidding me?

all day... well until about 5 pm or so. it was a post-thanksgiving miracle!

that morning, when mac first woke, he had even asked me about faith. what is it? what does it mean? he told me that God is all around and he's thankful for God.

into the morning, i found myself continuously trying to figure out what had brought this about. i could see right away that there was a great spirit of joy on mac and bode. and i know this is who they are. but what was the formula that got us to this morning of joyful obedience and treating each other with love and respect? was it the family time spent over the weekend? was it the way i discipline in love perfectly all of the time? (haha.) i kept asking davidrussell, what brought this as if it was some perfect batch of kids i had cooked up and i just needed to figure out how i or we did it so we could learn from that and do it more. well, how dumb. it took a while, but it did finally occur to me to just receive the gift. 

these aren't my kids, i just get to care for them for a couple of decades. so who am i to think i conjured up this lovely morning with my parenting skills. and i understand i don't have to be a perfect parent to "earn" great kids. He is doing an awesome work in mac and bode. my job is to see it and tell them about it. so what i learned most is to say thanks and ask for more days like yesterday.